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+ THE ADVENTURERS +
+ Epic II +
+ Many of the locations, non-player characters, spells, and +
+ other terms used in these stories are the property of TSR, Inc. +
+ However, this does not mean that TSR in any way endorses or +
+ authorizes their use, and any such items contained within these +
+ stories should not be considered representative of TSR in any +
+ way, shape, or form. +
+ The player characters contained in these writings are copy- +
+ right 1991-6 by Thomas Miller. Any resemblance to any persons +
+ or characters either real or fictional is utterly coincidental. +
+ Copying and/or distribution of these tales is permissible only +
+ under the sole condition that no part of them will be used or +
+ sold for profit. In that case, I hope you enjoy them... +
+ Thomas Miller +
+ firstname.lastname@example.org +
+ THE PARTY (all together again at last!): +
+ Alindyar 17th level dark elven wizard (N) +
+ Arnold 13th level human barbarian (NG) +
+ Belphanior (14th)^3 level elven fighter/wizard/thief (CN) +
+ Otto 8th/9th level dwarven fighter/thief (CN) +
+ Ged 15th/14th level grey elven priest/wizard (NG) +
+ Deryck 8th level half-elven ranger (NG) +
+ Nenya 8th/9th level female elven fighter/wizard (NG) +
+ Lyra 13th level female dark elven wizard (N) +
+ Mongo 18th level dwarven fighter (CG) +
+ Gorin 9th level dwarven fighter (NG) +
+ Peldor 20th level human thief (N) +
+ Bosco 11th level halfling thief (CN) +
+ Tanya 5th/11th level female human fighter/thief (N) +
+ Rillen 17th level human monk (N) +
+ Songa 13th level female human huntress (N) +
+ Date: 4/1/576 C.Y. (Common Year) +
+ Time: midday +
+ Place: Ged's lands, west of Greyhawk +
+ Climate: pleasant and sunny +
+ "Always get married early in the morning. That way, if it +
+ doesn't work out, you haven't wasted a whole day." +
+ - Mickey Rooney +
CCCLXXX. Wedding Bells
It is the beginning of the month of Planting, the onset of spring,
and all of the adventurers, past and present, have gathered for a
very special occasion.
Bosco: -right, I say! Nenya and Deryck are getting _married_!
(he prances about happily)
Rillen: Incredible. (he frowns) Not as incredible as Peldor and
Tanya, months from now, but still good news.
Rillen: (shakes his head)
Mongo: Nice to see you again, by the way. But, how'd you know? I
mean, from what I heard, you've been out there in the middle of
Ged: It was I who-
Rillen: I could hardly believe it! How in the world did you _find_
Rillen: Right, us.
Ged: (shrugs) Boccob knows all.
Peldor: Well, I wouldn't say that. I doubt that he knew about the
Tanya: (pinches Peldor on the rear) Shh.
Peldor: (grimaces) Ow.
Songa: (to Ged) What is a "Boccob"?
Ged: (simply) God of magic, spells, and all things arcane.
Songa: Bah. We have no use for such gods, in my lands.
Ged: (begins to retort, realizes that the woman stands nearly a
foot taller than him, and hesitates)
Arnold: (strolls up, and claps Songa on the shoulder) Greetinks.
Songa: Arnold! (they embrace)
Arnold: I was beginning to wonder about you.
Songa: (fixes her tribesman with a ridiculing gaze) Oh? Why
Arnold: (sheepishly) Well, Rillen went to seek you, but we
never heard anything...
Rillen: (appears next to Songa, putting his arm around her) It
all worked out.
Songa: (smiling) It did, at that.
Arnold: (grins, then frowns) Wait...you mean to say that...?
Rillen: (to Songa) What is he going on about?
Songa: I don't know.
Arnold: Y- you two are married, then?
Songa and Rillen: (simultaneously) Yes.
Arnold: (grins again) Excellent!
Bosco: (appears nearby) Married? You two? Heck, what's the
world coming to?
Rillen: Bosco! There you are. (to Songa) There he is.
Songa: A tiny one, that.
Bosco: Hey, I'm the holder of many titles! I'm Bosco, Juggernaut
Rillen: (pats Bosco on the head) We know, Bosco. We know.
Bosco: You do?
Rillen: Yes. Word of your deeds has spread far and wide.
Songa: (to Rillen) It has?
Bosco: Glad to hear it. (he gazes up at the twin titans before
him, then addresses Songa) Geez, you're tall.
Rillen: Songa, may I present Bosco, a clever rogue and adventurer.
His skills and daring have served the party - and himself - well
over the years.
Songa: (regards the minute halfling)
Bosco: Milady. (he reaches up to kiss her hand, but can't reach
Songa: (unused to such customs, she merely watches Bosco as he
jumps in place)
Mongo: (chatting with Belphanior) So, is everything okay in...
in...where did you say you're living these days?
Belphanior: I didn't.
Belphanior: (somewhat quietly) The town is called Helgate. It
hides amongst distant mountains.
Mongo: I'll have to come visit sometime.
Belphanior: (frowning) You should. It's quite an interesting
Ged: (approaches) You look happy, despite those recent...events.
Have you found a woman, or something like that? (he wonders if
Belphanior perhaps stumbled upon some mighty, ancient magic)
Belphanior: Woman? How'd you know?
Ged: (somewhat flabbergasted) Err...uh...it was easy to see.
Mongo: (sarcastically) Yeah, you had that look. That glow...
Belphanior: (smiles, thinking of Victoria) Hmm.
Peldor: (strolls up) Hi, there.
Belphanior: (clasps his friend's hand firmly) Greetings, and well-
met. How's the inn?
Peldor: Doing well, doing well. and you?
Belphanior: Life is...interesting. So, what's this I hear about
_you_ being the next one to walk to the altar?
Peldor: (grins) It's all true. This Midsummer, Tanya becomes
Belphanior: (shaking his head, he yet smiles) The great Peldor,
married! Who'd have thought it?
Peldor: Certainly not me, but then all things change.
Belphanior: (sighs) We're getting old.
Just then, a tall, tan-skinned, blond-haired woman approached.
She was older than any of the other humans present, perhaps in
her late thirties. Still, she had the look of a seasoned veteran,
and the blazing sun-sigil sewn into her robe identified her as a
high priestess of Pelor, god of light and healing. The woman
passed by, glancing at Belphanior quizzically for a moment, then
walked right up to Ged, taking his arm in hers.
Derider: Don't forget that you have a ceremony to perform at
Ged: (eyes the sunny sky) Midday? That's still a while from
Derider: Not too much longer.
Ged: (frowning) How do you know this?
Derider: (shrugs, smiling) A high priestess of Pelor, who rules
the sun, always knows such things.
Ged: Oh. (bidding his companions a polite farewell, he wanders
away with Derider)
Belphanior: (watches Ged go, his mouth agape)
Mongo: What's the matter, never seen a happy couple before?
Belphanior: (amazed) Ged has a girlfriend?
Peldor: Welllll...I wouldn't say _that_. But it is true that
he and that classy lady have been seeing a lot of each other.
Belphanior: Still the king of gossip and rumors, eh?
Peldor: No, just the king of spies and intelligence. There's not
much I don't know.
Alindyar: (walks up to this conversation) That was Ged's woman?
Peldor: Now don't be starting rumors! They're just friends, at
the moment anyway.
Lyra: (appears at Alindyar's side) Try and remember that Ged's
a priest, after all.
Tanya: (talking with Deryck, who is suited up like a king) You
Deryck: (shakes his head, which causes his ponytail to shift
position) I'm still nervous.
Bosco: (as is his style, he appears from nowhere) Why? Afraid
you might trip on the way to the altar? Afraid that perhaps
your money-pouch is missing-
Deryck: No. I'm just nervous.
Tanya: Don't be. Trust me, it's a lot more stressful for the
Deryck: Yes...yes...where _is_ Nenya?
Tanya: Fear not, you'll see her soon enough. (she looks around,
spotting Gorin nearby)
Otto: (to Gorin) I don't know most of these people. (he frowns)
Not that I care.
Gorin: Heck, _I_ don't know most of these people! (he points)
Over there, those are Nenya's parents, from Veluna.
Otto: They look like fairies.
Gorin: They _are_ fairies.
Gorin: I believe that group over there is Deryck's parents, and
brothers and sisters, and half-brothers and half-sisters...
Otto: Humans and elves...he's got two families. Cripes.
Gorin: It's the way it is, I guess.
Peldor: (having finally gotten Belphanior aside, he whispers to
the elf) What if someone recognizes you? Someone like a city
guard captain? Derider's one of those, you know!
Belphanior: (shrugs) I didn't know she'd be here.
Peldor: But still...
Belphanior: I don't care. I'll take my chances. I'm not hiding
for the rest of my life, you know.
Rillen: (approaches) I'm not interrupting anything, am I?
Peldor: Of course not.
Rillen: (clasps hands with Belphanior) Good to see you again.
Belphanior: Always. Who's that amazon you're with?
Rillen: Songa is my mate.
Belphanior: (raises an eyebrow) "Mate" as in wife?
Belphanior: Oh. (he looks up) So you're _already_ married?
Rillen: This seems to be the question of choice for me today.
(sighs) Yes, I am already married.
Belphanior: Relax. It's cool, I say.
Peldor: You and she married in the village?
Rillen: (nods) It was a fittingly simple ceremony.
Belphanior: (staring at Songa, who is now talking with Derider,
though Ged's nowhere in sight) Quite a woman.
Rillen: Watch out, or she'll challenge you to combat.
Belphanior: (frowns) Why?
Rillen: Just for the hell of it. She's a wild one.
Peldor: Yeah, I figured that.
Lyra: (joins this conversation) Where did you find her?
Rillen: It was years ago...when you and Alindyar were thought
Lyra: Oh. (she smiles) Things have certainly changed since then!
Peldor: And we're all glad.
Belphanior: Being dead is never any fun. Trust me, I've been
Bosco: I heard Belphanior had a girlfriend!
Otto: Maybe you hear too much.
Bosco: Not possible. So where is she? No woman's complete until
she's met Bosco!
Otto: (frowns) She couldn't make it, for some reason. Had some-
thing to do.
Bosco: Well, that's too bad. I sure would've-
Bosco: (startled, he looks up and behind him, where the huntress
now towers) What?!? I didn't even hear you walk up!
Otto: (also surprised, he mutters) Neither did I...
Songa: Why is there a small animal climbing up your back?
Bosco: Huh? (reaching around, he grabs the ferret) Oh, this
guy! This is Groucho. (to the ferret) Say hi, Groucho.
Groucho: (squirms as Bosco presents him to Songa)
Otto: Ferrets? What good are they?
Bosco: Well, they like to steal things...
Bosco: I have three more...but they had to stay at home. Only
Groucho got to come to this wedding. But I promised the others
I'd bring them all to Peldor's.
Otto: Maybe you should ask Peldor first.
Songa: (plays with Groucho for a few moments, then loses interest
and wanders away)
Bosco: (to Otto) Why, I could have half these people's purses,
if I chose to unleash Groucho! (his eyes light up) Just think
Otto: Maybe this would be a bad time.
Bosco: (frowns sadly) Probably so.
Suddenly, a band began to play. A top-notch group, these
bards had been assembled by Peldor, using his contacts in the
city. The various guests and adventurers found and took seats,
waiting for the ceremony to begin. At the front of this lawn
within Ged's castle grounds stood an impressive altar to Boccob.
Beneath this was Ged, fully frocked in his priestly robes. At
his side stood Deryck, handsome and stocky in his outfit, and
Momentarily, the band began playing the music that heralded
the coming of the couples in the wedding party. As this was a
fairly simple affair (though nowhere near as simple as his own,
Rillen noted smugly to himself) it wasn't long at all before
Nenya walked down the grassy aisle. There was no denying it,
she looked radiant. Her long silver hair flowed freely in the
slight wind, and her matching dress, silvery silk with black
lining, followed behind her, dragging silently over the grass.
This outdoor ceremony was partly in deference to Deryck, though
Nenya didn't really mind anyway.
Shortly, Nenya stood at Deryck's side, before Ged, and the
vows were spoken...
Ged: -in the eyes of Boccob and all other deities of Good?
Nenya: I most certainly do.
Ged: (turns to a young lad) Have you the ring?
Calvin: (his eyes widen as he fishes through his pockets)
Deryck: (noticing this, he bites his lip)
Calvin: (mouths "just kidding" as he holds up, then hands to
Deryck a golden ring, topped by a fine gemstone)
Ged: (motions to a tiny elven girl to hand Nenya the other
Deryck and Nenya put each others' rings on simultaneously, and
Ged completed the marriage ceremony.
Ged: -now pronounce you man and wife!
Nenya was smiling radiantly, her face a classic example of
that mystical, legendary elven beauty that poets write about
and bards sing about. Deryck was stunned, and probably would
have forgotten to kiss his bride if Ged hadn't whispered at
him. As Deryck did that final thing, the assembled crowd (even
the elves, who were less than happy about one of their own
wedding a half-elf) cheered madly. Flowers flew, champagne
sprayed, and happy chaos ruled the day.
Peldor: (sighs) Ah...
Belphanior: Don't forget, you're next.
Mongo: Heck, Alindyar and Lyra might yet beat you to it...
Alindyar: (cryptically) One never knows.
Peldor: Yep...and don't forget about Rillen and Songa, who are
Bosco: (watches Rillen and Songa as they mingle nearby) One
thing's for sure: those two are gonna have some tall kids!
next: strangeness is afoot
ftp: ftp.digex.net in /pub/access/dpm/rpg/stories/adventurers
mail: email@example.com (preferred)
notes: It'd been a while since I first brought this plotline
up...episode #337 to be exact. And here we are. What can I say?
Marriage is in the air...or at least in my head... :)
Just think how much simpler weddings would be without the need
for pictures and filming and all that!
Everything this wedding didn't have will be in Peldor and
Tanya's; I didn't want to do this one so well that I couldn't
top it later.
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next chapter (#381)